"Gayle, Somewhere Else"

"We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time."

~T.S. Eliot

I have traveled a lot over the past two years. A LOT. I believe travel is the best education certainly, yet there is a time and place for it. As a painter, I need a quiet studio, without frenetic energy, in which to create. Some artists thrive on chaos in which to make their art, but not me. To gather moss is not necessarily a bad thing. Moss is productive in its own right. But the "rolling stone gathers no moss" maxim has an important message. Do not stagnate. Stay active, even when you are still. 

So, travel. Experiences outside of the studio: Camping in Denali and Yosemite National Park, The Mediterranean, Cappadocia, Vancouver Island, The Yukon, Manhattan, The Outer Banks, the Midwest, the desert, the ocean, fireflies, many moons. All of these experiences have enriched me enough to last a lifetime. I cherish each memory. But the most important thing I have gleaned from these two years is that I need to return to the figure. I want to re-examine what can never be truly understood. Painting a form, a person, who may be somewhere else, far away, but appears to rest, that is the undiscovered country that I want to explore. 

Many people have commented that my self-portraits and figurative work convey sadness. "Gayle, Somewhere Else", oil on panel, 40"x48"is no exception. But she is not sad. Or maybe she is. My goal is not to paint someone 'posing', someone aware of the viewer. I want to capture the quiet moments of solitude. Often in solitude we are not smiling from ear to ear, and sometimes we are. Thus my portraits are contemplative yes, but, by and large, not sad (to me). And to be sad...is that such a horrible thing? Without sadness how could we appreciate the happy times? Just saying.

Here is the first stage of the painting. I wanted to include these so that you could see how it all developed. For the first couple of painting sessions I just tried to cover the white of the canvas. I should do an underpainting, but I'm too impatient. I try to move around the canvas and work the entire piece as much as possible to retain balance. I mix each brush stroke or two with new paint. I never work with a pre-mixed batch of a certain colour. Again, no patience. It is funny how we get into habits, routines. Perhaps we are not meant to break them :)

Stage two finds the colour spreading as the drapery starts to take form. 

Below you see the painting almost completed. I wanted the drapery to encircle her, as it protecting her. I had worked quite a bit on the skin tones here but still was dealing with rendering the sheets to my satisfaction. One friend has commented that the sheets resemble the folds of one's mind. I like that metaphor. She is quite oblivious to the outside world, or appears so, and instead is negotiating the terrain of her mind. 

Upon completing this painting I was filled with a sense of happiness to be back doing what I love most...capturing the figure in quiet moments. The next year will be filled with more of these paintings, as well as completing some commissions. I know that I will always travel, always need to get out, camp, hike and see new places. And be aware that this blog post is coming to you from Fairbanks, Alaska! But happily, I will take off my hiking boots soon. It is good. It is balance. And balance is everything.   

Have a wonderful day, wherever in the world you may be....

Heather

"Gayle, Somewhere Else" is also available as a print!  Check out the link here on Deviantart. Thanks!

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"Reality leaves a lot to the imagination."~John Lennon

"Gayle With Sheet"

"Journeys, like artists, are born and not made. A thousand differing circumstances contribute to them, few of them willed or determined by the will-whatever we may think."

~Lawrence Durrell

Journeys are so often internal rather than external. The road traveled within is often fraught with just as many potholes, flash floods and pitfalls as any transcontinental pilgrimage. The mountains that exist within our mind are often far more difficult to climb let alone summit than any craggy butte that we might encounter in the flesh. On the flip side, the joy we can attain from simply daydreaming, the limitless possibilities that exist within our mind can be every bit as satisfying as seeing the sun rise in the arctic, looking back on a river paddled and swimming in a cerulean ocean. The point is the journey itself, rather than the outcome, isn't it?

Would we appreciate the summit if we had not struggled to surmount it? Would we appreciate our successes half as much if we were simply handed them? Probably not.

"Gayle With Sheet", oil on canvas, 30"x24", is, surprise, surprise, a metaphor. From a purely superficial standpoint I enjoyed painting two paintings really; Gayle covered in the sheet and the room beyond. They are two different elements that our mind continually tries to connect. I like the fact that Gayle will never go into that room, that she will be forever musing over who-knows-what. that the door will remain ajar for eternity. 

Technically I had so much fun painting this piece. Gayle's house, as I have mentioned before, is from the 1860's. The house has a pulse of its own. It is cold often, but welcoming. The wood stove that heats the main room is forever graced by the presence of the family cat. The ceilings are high, the windows wide, the atmosphere serene. This painting was one more chance to capture a small piece of that special place.

I had a great time painting the wood. I wanted to show that the colour of the wood is different in each room, and that it is worn on the lip between the kitchen and Gayle's studio. The sheet was of course challenging in all of the best ways. If we don't challenge ourselves we can't really improve. When Gayle moved her foot to cross it over her other foot I had her hold that pose. I liked that it showed her humanity, her settling into the pose and seeking comfort by casually crossing her feet. Those unpredictably serendipitous moments are so satisfying.

What I wanted to accomplish in this piece was the interplay of the two rooms and two narratives. Gayle might be thinking about something in that room. She may not. I love that we will never know.  It is a journey that only she travels. It is proof that it is ok to not know all of the answers. The paths we choose within our minds and with our feet are beautifully uncertain, and perhaps we can be inspired by that mystery.

"The only journey is the one within."~Rainer Maria Rilke

  

"The Side Door"

"When you follow your bliss...doors will open where you would not have

 thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else."

 ~Joseph Campbell

"The Side Door", oil on canvas, 72"x48", is the largest painting I have ever completed. It was intimidating to cover such a large space, and yet to many artists this size of painting is probably an every day task. To me, it seemed an ocean of white, my brushes appeared far too small to cover such an area. I am sure it was similar to the fear that some writers feel when they stare at the expectant blank page on their computer, typewriter or notepad. Personally, small paintings are comfortable. I addressed this in my note about "Self-Portrait, Renewed". I feel more freedom within the confines of a little painting. Large paintings seem to carry more of an expectation, as though they must shout their message. It was a great learning experience tackling this painting which was the last piece I completed for my "Passages" show in 2007 at Abbozzo Gallery. 

"The Side Door" appears in the background of the painting "Work In Progress", that I just blogged about recently. I wanted the two paintings to tie together visually and also enjoyed the idea of seeing "The Side Door" being worked on within another painting. I painted the two pieces in conjunction with one another but naturally "The Side Door" took much longer to complete. 

The subject once again is my friend Gayle and her beautiful house north of Burlington. This house is so special, so old, with such a history; it seems to live and breathe in concert with Gayle and her family. This house wants to be painted. I have captured Gayle and her house in more than half a dozen paintings. The entire experience of visiting Gayle at home is special every time. As Andrew Wyeth painted The Kuerners innumerable times over three decades, so I intend to paint Gayle at her stone house for as long as I am able. No matter what far reach of the continent I travel to, this special piece of land and the people who live there continue to draw me back. 

The porch you see on the side of the house is no longer there. Gayle's husband has since replaced it with a beautiful new porch (he is a woodworker). I am pleased to have captured the old porch before it came down, a little piece of its history kept intact. My aim with this piece was to ask the viewer to wonder where she was going and where she had been. I sought movement from the melting snow in a pattern of thaw that would circle around and lead the eye to Gayle opening the door. Where does that door lead? Can the viewer tell that the pane of glass in the lower section of the door has broken? I remember Gayle remarking about the broken glass and worrying that it might spoil the painting to have to paint a boarded window. On the contrary, it is precisely for that very reason that I wanted to paint it. It is the imperfections that are often truly beautiful. It indicates movement and life, that things are happening there, that it is lived in. I also used Gayle's poppy red hat once again as a nice splash of colour to bring the viewer's eye to her and focus there for awhile. Also the aluminum container by the door was fun to paint...I love to paint things just as they are and not shift things around too much. I would rather move than expect things to move for me. It is much the same as when models ask what they should wear...."whatever you enjoy and feels comfortable" I usually reply, though I do suggest that perhaps complex patterns might be avoided. I'd rather not go crazy rendering paisley or plaid. 

There are always little parts of a painting that are particularly enjoyable to paint. In this case it is Gayle's reflection in the glass. When I look upon it I still remember the very painting session that I painted that part, almost like when you are taken back to distance times when you smell something familiar. It is as though there is a creative fingerprint on that section. It has its own memory.

Exciting news! My next solo exhibition is pretty much finalized. If you can make it I would love it if you stopped by to see my new work inspired from a recent adventure in Newfoundland, Canada. This exhibition will examine the people and places I encountered in the truly magical land of Newfoundland. I hope to see you there!

                 

Heather Horton

Newfoundland Portraits

November 6-22th, 2009

Abbozzo Gallery

 Oakville, Ontario, Canada

Opening Reception Friday November 6th, 7-10pm

I am posting sneak peeks of works as I paint them that you can see via my regular website. 

Have a beautiful day,

Heather

 

"The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live."~Flora Whittemore

The Two Gayles

One's real life is so often the life that one does not lead.

~Oscar Wilde

"The Two Gayles" is another painting from my doppelganger series. I wanted to explore the notion of an interconnectedness between these two women. Or perhaps they are the same woman, but glimpses of her through different facets of her psyche or at different points of the day?  I do not analyze why I paint what I paint. Creative origins are for an analyst, or a couch on which I am not quite ready to recline. Whether literal or metaphorical, I simply wanted to ask questions and create a bit of unease with the piece.

Sometimes I am motivated by my unconscious. Certainly it has to surface to some degree, to manifest itself  through the paint. I wanted to once again explore the idea of an image with a figure sitting on the side of a bed as if pondering, reflecting or even regretting something. As with "The Two Figures" I wanted to capture a sense of inward wrestling, but quietly, under an expression of apparent serenity. 

The beauty of the tripod is what enabled me to capture the reference for this piece. I had Gayle lie on the bed and shoot some shots and then, without moving the camera and tripod, had her sit on the edge of the bed with a sweater on. I did a bit of creative editing with the painting so that she fit more completely on the canvas. 

Above all, I did seek to create an unspoken dialogue between the two figures. Though silent, there is a tension there. Each of us has so many facets to our personalities, an inner tension as much as the vagaries that we display to the outside world. We have so many choices available to us at any given moment, and that is the beauty of who we are. Even the smallest choices, the seemingly trivial decisions, all have repercussions. That is what makes the world such a splendidly magnificent place I think.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do 

with your one wild and precious life?

~Mary Oliver